hot mess in a prada dress
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Posted on 19th Oct at 6:34 AM, with 5,950 notes


"Nudity is a costume too. I didn’t necessarily feel naked."

- Marine Vacth


Posted on 16th Oct at 5:06 AM

the results of heightened stress and anxiety are not pretty.

I just realised i had seriously picked at my skin and pulled hair out

also tomorrow i’m committing to taking my meds again to see if I cope better. I need my brain to be sharp and as focused as possible for exams and right know it is sludge

Posted on 16th Oct at 4:58 AM

finished the group assignment, huge weight off my shoulders, then went and saw dietician, weight back on them. she challenges me which is necessary, especially since i hadn’t seen her since the start of the year, and i guess a lot has and can change in that time, and i don’t get challenged about food (and exercise now) like that anymore at home by family 

but it also brought up thoughts and issues i have with my family which made me feel uneasy and I can tell mum is pissed off now because things i said but she’s a fucking selfish drama queen.

I’m just focusing on myself now, for the better, and not getting into her or anyone else’s bullshit. this is my one life to live and i won’t be made to feel like shit by anyone (and i won’t let myself treat myself like shit either)

anyway she said i should probably journal more, i find it easier to type so I’m sorry if you read this. dad took my blood this morning, hopefully my iron levels, white blood cells and vitamin D etc. are better and i’ve also been told to up my calcium and find ways to have more which is a struggle. she also said i should finally go get my bone density scan but I’m kinda scared to see how much stress I’ve put on my bones over the years, but it could also be a good thing, a reality check of sorts to kick me in the butt. (& also i need to stop running because that’ll make them worse at this point)

now I’m going to relax and watch a movie or something since i had a shit sleep and have been slaving my mind over work. (actually i pretty much spent all yesterday precast-drinking and procasti-eating, does anyone else do that???? 🐰

00:00 AM